Wednesday, November 18, 2009

lunch time.

I'm posting a blog during my lunchtime at the office. today's my fourth day working here
which I've decided that it's incredibly awesome. but nevermind about that.
if you're wondering why I'm at my desk during lunch time instead of eating lunch. that's the problem. I don't feel like eating caused by that big piece of chunk in me that's missing now. it's no biggie, but just have to go through this feeling for another 24 hours and I'll be fine.
I'm in of those modes where I'm out of my comfort zone, slightly scared but not to worry. I have supportive friends all around me. yay. :D big smile for me. I know I haven't said the cause of me being like this cuz I'm still dancing around the issue. haha. I just wanna say how I feel first, then I'd tell what's the problem.. btw, i'm fine.
my feelings first, cuz it's my blog and i'm typing. so don't u bloody call me selfish.
back to topic.
Just slightly sluggish from the state I am in. How do i say this without revealing too much info? I'm not obligated to write this out but I need to challege myself. for there is nothing else to do now during my lunch break...
okay, I'm all sluggish and numb cuz it takes one hour of flight out of Malaysia to fix me. so we're talking bout different countries here. meaning no calls, no text no emails.. and we're talking about a man's sport here. so hands down i won't win. heee..
no no, I'm fine. it's just this sluggish feeling I have. I'm still doing work and talking to people.
( I dont know if sluggish is the right term, but as long as people get what I mean)
another reason i'm not out for lunch is cuz i'm waiting for my dad to come and pass my handphone. can't u believe it?? me, mua?! forgot my handphone. one of the most precious things in my life. (u dummy, not becuz of the price of the phone, it's cuz i can't call the ppl i love!)
maybe I'm in a worse state than I thought. but takpe la.. i'm not suicidal or planning to do anything crazy (YET!).. so i'm still fine...
i've been saying i'm fine so many times in this post, i think i'm trying to persuade myself to be fine more than telling people i'm fine. but nevermind.

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